up and running again..

I finally have the electricity up and running again in my apt. Thank goodness, now I don’t have sit inthe dark anymore walking around with a candle stick. I must say though candle light is pretty cool it has this illuminating affect not sure as to why but, I enjoy it. So basically this is my first blog back online.  AWESOME ! lol   Things have been pretty difficult in the past few weeks, only to have them be even much more harder this up and coming weeks. Its funny as I had this thought in my mind while I was at work. It was a slow day and i was looking out the window, I just wish I could open the window and simply fly away. Not really sure where Iwould go, but just the very fact I could fly away from everything and not have to worry anymore about the stress of trying to get by. Sometimes I try very hard to keep positive and I feel like “hey I can make it” !  Most of the time i feel beat down and just ready to throw in the towel. I never thought life could be so rough, I feel as though I’ve lived many lives and yet here I am trying to make sense of everything.    I’m thinking if I should just go back home to cali maybe regroup and start a new. Who knows…. But I have to realise a few things I do want…..

1. continue working on my art work.

 

2. work with people in service.

 

3.CHILDREN!!!

 

Those are the main things that are calling to me and which are immensely important to me at this time.

one moment … please while I connect

It feels as though it had been such a long ass time I’ve since I had used a computer when in reality it was only for a week lol. Its funny my whole life is based all around this stupid squared box in which I stare into it for hours. It has my mail, my tv shows, my music, shopping, hell even some art I’m interested in reading up on.  At some point I didn’t have a clock I had no freaking idea what time it was or what day it was MY CELL PHONE couldn’ be charged nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! Everything is back on track now YAY!! (APPLAUSE )

I’ve also decided to make a few changes to my apartment, mainly because I’m sick of seeing barren white insane asylum walls.   I’m starting to hang up pictures and also to practice drawing on my walls.. NOOOOOOO Not drawing on my walls but, on paper that is stuck on to my walls. you may now breathe a sigh of relief.  Oh and candle light always makes a world of difference unless your like me and you light the candles up with a piece of paper while doing ten billion other things, then with that same piece of paper you decided to throw it away in the trash bag which hold tons of plastics and pieces of paper. Luckily I caught myself in time and i was able to save the apartment from being burnt down.  GO ME!